A retreat to Costa Rica is NOT the answer to your problems
May 6, 2024
Late 2019, I found myself desperately searching for more. Two years off the heels of a divorce, dealing with the aftermath of working too much while watching my stepfather fade away, and then witnessing his passing before my eyes, I felt empty. I hated my job, and I needed out. I had already started making changes, seeing a therapist, and doing some light work on myself. But I still craved an escape.
There were posts I saw every day about retreats to Costa Rica or other really great destinations. After my stepfather's passing, I genuinely believed that leaving the country, leaving my home, was the only answer to feeling better, to healing, to finding whatever it was I was desperately searching for. Everything was a reminder of what I didnt have. I wanted out.
I was actively looking at trips, considering silent retreats, or just regular getaways. At one point, I nearly booked a trip to New Zealand to visit family and tour the country side there. But then the universe had other plans, COVID-19 happened, and all travel plans came to a screeching halt.
Suddenly, I was faced with my own reality—my own four walls, my own self—during a global pandemic. I had recently quit drinking, and now I was forced to confront the hurt, the grief, the pain, and the loneliness on my own. Not ideal, but looking back, I'm grateful it happened that way.
I'm grateful because I've learned that you don't need a trip away, as compelling as it might seem. I'm not saying you should never travel; exploring the world can be incredibly enriching.
But it will not cure or resolve what you're feeling.
It might offer temporary relief, but it won't address the root cause of your struggles.
So how do you know if you can benefit from doing the work at home? Here are some signs you’re ready:
- Feeling a sense of unease or dissatisfaction but recognizing that running away won't solve the root cause.
- Recognizing the need to address underlying emotions or patterns of behaviour.
- Being open to self-reflection and personal growth, even if it means facing discomfort.
- Seeking support and resources to work through challenges and build resilience from within.
- Understanding that true healing comes from within and requires consistent effort and commitment.
The truth is, real change doesn't come from simply escaping your problems; it comes from facing them head-on.
The more introspection and awareness we cultivate within ourselves, the better equipped we are to navigate life's challenges. And the best place to do that? Right at home, where you're subject to the triggers and stressors that need addressing.
But here's the key: add in the support, the tools, and the resources that can help you navigate those challenges and forge a path forward. And trust me, that's not something you'll only find in Costa Rica—it's something you'll find within yourself, with support at home.
So, let go of the notion that a retreat or a trip to paradise is the only solution to solve all your problems. Embrace the power of doing the inner work, right where you are. Trust in your ability to navigate life's challenges and create a fulfilling, purpose-driven life, one step at a time.
Breathe it in, be deliberate, and be good to yourself!
Chelsea
aka The Deliberate One
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