There are days that I don’t feel that I am enough

September 30, 2024

I feel like I haven’t done enough,

I’m not good enough

I’m not healed enough

I’ve not lived enough

I’ve never been enough

There are days that I worry people will find out that I’m this total mess of not enough-ness. Personally, professionally.

There are days that I’m afraid to say that I feel this way because it will confirm what my mind is saying. That I’m weak, that I’m behind. And of course, not enough.

If there has ever been any proof that this growth journey is anything but linear, this is it.

Because the key here is that it’s ’there are days’

Before, it would be every day.

Every. Single. day living in not enough-ness

This is progress. Massive progress.

I remind my clients, as much as I remind myself, that it took time to accumulate this limited belief that I am not enough.

And so it takes time to unlearn that and to reinforce new belief systems that create the foundation of my enough-ness (and truly, so much more than enough).

I reinforce this new foundation of belief by:

~ acknowledging where I learned the previous one, offering my inner child, my inner me, comfort for carrying that burden in the first place

~ giving thanks for what this is telling me I need right now (to pour more into me, more than to anyone else)

~ speaking kindness into the parts (both physical and mental) that I’ve deemed unworthy, unlovable, and not enough

~ creating space, taking a breath and zooming out for some necessary perspective of what’s real, and what fallacy my mind is saying

~ reading my ‘accolades’ folder. All the beautiful and simple things people have said to me about the impact Ive made in their life

And when I do these things I soon find myself on the other side of not enough-ness and back onto this foundation of inherent worth and worthiness I’m building.

The key is acknowledging it in the first place and creating a new response.

To avoid getting sucked into the bad thoughts, which feed the bad feelings, which perpetuate the bad thoughts. This tortuous cycle. We can stop that.

Meet this not enough-ness with softness and curiosity and of course, no judgment. Meet these parts of yourself because they are all worthy.

‘‘There’s a multitude of beings inside you: the shiny happy parts; the sad confused parts. Many of them are shunned or disparaged.  All deserve a place at your table.’’ - Angi Sullins

Breathe it in, Be Deliberate, and please know you’re enough!

Chelsea

aka The Deliberate One

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